Grandparenting in the NOW!

I never gave much thought to what it would be like to be a grandmother…I have three adult children and held the belief that whenever they were ready to have children that’s when I was meant to become a grandmother. Unlike some mothers, I never asked nor will I ever ask my children, “When are you starting a family?” or “When are you going to make me a grandmother?” My children’s lives are theirs, not mine and I respect whatever they choose.

 

Last year my oldest became a father and, of course, I became a first-time grandmother. Now I never, ever thought I’d be one of “those” grandmothers—you know, the ones that think “their” grandchildren are extra special. Well, guess what? I fall in that category, absolutely 100 percent—you betcha! And I will be the first to admit it. I have photos of my granddaughter all over the kitchen and living room and when I have new ones, I am challenged to remove the previous ones. Sometimes I don’t—I just keep adding more. Hmmm, when I get to the point that I am covering the walls, maybe I can call it Grandparent WallpaperJ.

 

In April we celebrated Cianna’s first birthday—I couldn’t have been more excited. After all, she is my only grandchild. However, even if she wasn’t, I would still have been excited. Being a grandparent is so very different than being a parent. Watching my son being such a loving, caring father to his little “cuteness” is so heartwarming.

 

 

And as a grandmother I find it very easy to love my granddaughter simply because she exists. That’s what grandparenting is all about—unconditional love. I must add however that Cianna makes it very easy to love her. She has what I call charisma. She engages people and her enthusiasm is contagious—people are naturally drawn to her. I know, I know—earlier I said I’m one of “those” grandmothers, so of course I’d be saying this about “my” granddaughter. And that’s okay. By the way, I must also state that I am very pleased that Cianna exhibits a strong will. That’s important—I don’t want to see her focusing only on pleasing others!

 

Besides the love, there is the fun. Yes, grandparenting Cianna is fun—she responds enthusiastically to everything she sees or hears. If I sing (and I do not sing well) or if she hears music, she immediately starts dancing and clapping her hands. And, like most females, she can really talk—of course, it is baby talk right now. Many times though I can pick out words that she says very clearly. The one she’s been saying the most over these past months is “wow”. I love it. She enters a room and points to something with wide eyes and says, “wow”. It doesn’t matter how many times she has seen whatever she’s pointing to, it’s still “wow”. How neat would that be if we adults still had that sense of awe about everything?

 

When we were babies we may not have all acted and communicated in exactly the same way; however, we all did live in the present moment. We were not obsessed with the past nor were we worried about what the future would bring. Babies and small children live in the NOW—they are focused and in awe of what is right in front of them.

 

As grandparents, we get a second chance; we get the opportunity to experience life through the eyes of our grandchildren. My granddaughter can be laughing one minute, crying the next and within an instant, laughing again. The emotions are just passing through her—there’s no thought process, no analyzing. Being in her presence has me get into the NOW and I feel more alive because she is so alive. It’s so easy to forget everything except what is in the moment—what a great feeling!

 

Today when I went outdoors I looked up at the sky and said, “wow”. Yes, I thought of little Cianna’s enthusiasm and decided to try it out. It did lift my spirits—actually had me chuckling a bit. So, my request is that you join me in remembering from time to time throughout the day, whether with or without grandchildren, to experience the moment, whatever it holds. Look at something and really “see” it and be in awe of it. You may want to look up at the sky and say, “wow” every time you step outside—I think I will!

 

Julie Molner